I Think a Few Changes Are Only Fair

     There are a few things that are unjust in the world and I would like to point them out and propose some changes. The first is what happens to women's bodies when they have a baby. It's bad enough what we go through during pregnancy and childbirth itself, but we should not be left with stretch marks and saggy breasts. I propose that with every child a woman has her skin becomes more supple and free from stretch marks or scars. This includes c-section scars. They should heal in a week or two and be gone forever. I also propose that with every child you breast feed your breasts become slightly larger, firmer and perkier for all the wear and tear.
     Now, to address all those sleepless nights that we have as moms. How many times have you stumbled through your day because you were up all night holding a fussy baby. When you look in the mirror the next morning someone who resembles the Incredible Hulk is staring back at you, complete with the greenish tone to your skin. To remedy this I propose that with every child we have, we need, lets say, two hours less of sleep each night to feel refreshed and looking our best. By the time a woman has three or four babies she won't need hardly any sleep at all and could conquer the world. Can you imagine all that you could do if you only needed two hours of sleep each night?
     How about the sickness part? It's bad enough that we have to clean up the vomit and diarrhea for our beloved children for years, a mother shouldn't have to go through this herself, ever! After having the worst case of the flu this weekend that I have ever had, I propose that after giving birth a mother should be totally immune to any and all illnesses that beset her family. It's only fair that if we have to take care of them that we should be able to do so without fear of contracting such disgusting bugs.
     Who's with me here?  Who do I contact to see this becomes a reality?